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The 49th Day of the Counting of the Omer

6/2/2014

 
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The 49th day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Monday night. Tonight we count seven weeks of the Omer, the last day of the counting. Tuesday night will begin Shavuot.

This is the day of Malchut within Malchut, nobility within nobility. Today, after walking through the previous 48 gates of paired qualities, I think about the big picture of my life. What, ultimately, makes my life worthwhile, meaningful and noble?

Each of us lives a life that is a paradox. We are all stuck inside of our own heads, never being able to experience life from any vantage other than through our own eyes, ears, memories and brains. We never really get to see the world directly through the experiences of another person. Yet, we also recognize that to live only for ourselves is not really any life at all. Without ever being able to be anyone else, we have to live our lives for the benefit of the strangers who live behind eyes we will never get to see through. 

This is what can make our lives noble. For me, the great leap of faith is not the leap of believing in a supernatural God high above us. For me, the leap is believing that, by living for others, we can stretch our existence beyond the limitations of being stuck in our own minds. We become truly and deeply noble when we give away our lives – the greatest gift anyone has ever received – and commit them to the service of others.

When we do that, we become champions and heroes. When we live unselfish and giving lives, we overcome our inborn instinct to gather up everything we can and keep it all for ourselves. We transcend the desire to withdraw into the familiarity of our own egos. We lift ourselves beyond the limitations that physics and biology have decreed upon us, and we become the champions of our own lives.

On this final day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to living my life as if it matters beyond myself. I commit to living as if the whole world depends upon my ability to see beyond my own narrow needs and interests. In a way, the world does depend upon it. In a way, the world depends upon all of us living that way.

May this be a day for you in which you become the champion of your own life.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 48th Day of the Counting of the Omer

6/1/2014

 
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The 48th day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Sunday night. Tonight we count six weeks and six days of the Omer.

This is the day of Yesod within Malchut, connection within nobility. Today I am thinking about how nobility is revealed in our relationships with other people. Could there possibly be a better way of demonstrating the highest within us than in the way we connect with others?

One of the great things about my job is that I get to see ordinary people doing extraordinarily noble things. Here are some examples:

• I have seen a group of churches and synagogues come together on their own to set up an emergency food pantry to feed hungry people in the aftermath of the worldwide financial meltdown.

• I have seen people make very generous donations, anonymously, so that the children of strangers could spend the summer at Jewish summer camps.

• I have seen a group of parents – many of whom were paying for their own children's bar and bat mitzvah celebrations – come together to pay for the celebration of another child whose family was going through a crisis. 

• Just this week, I have seen a rabbi's grieving family receive an outpouring of sympathy and support from members of the congregation he is about to leave. I have seen the same outpouring of sympathy and support from the congregation he has not yet even begun to serve. 

I know that I have been the beneficiary of such noble love and care many times in my life – and right now in particular. I am tremendously grateful. I have seen how people truly merit eternity in the selfless and beautiful things that they do for one another.

On this 48th Day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to strive toward such nobility myself. I commit to connecting with people in small and profound ways that allow the best to shine through.

May this be a day for you in which you connect to others and discover the highest within yourself.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 47th Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/31/2014

 
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The 47th day of the Counting of the Omer begins as Shabbat ends on Saturday night. Tonight we count six weeks and five days of the Omer.

This is the day of Hod within Malchut, humility within nobility. Today I am thinking about my mother-in-law, Amy Wolfson, who died last night after a long battle with cancer. Her funeral is Monday. I am thinking about how much she loved her family and how much we will miss her.

If we human beings have any real claim on nobility, it is not because of what we can do with rocket ships, how deeply we can probe into the laws of nature, or how many comforts we can surround ourselves with. It is only in our ability to know each other, care for one another, and, in all humility, recognize how dependent we are upon each other.

Amy Wolfson was an accomplished attorney who worked hard and won recognition. But the thing she cared about more than anything else was her role as a mother to her three children and their spouses, a grandmother to her four grandchildren, A sister to her brother, a faithful friend to her friends, and a leader in her Temple Sisterhood. All she cared about was the way she connected deeply to others. In that, she lived a truly noble and humble life.

On this 47th Day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to living by her example and finding my nobility, not in conventionally recognized accomplishments, but in the way I form meaningful relationships with others.

May this be a day for you in which you grow in your recognition of your connection to others and, in so doing, arise to your most noble self.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

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The 46th Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/30/2014

 
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The 46th day of the Counting of the Omer begins with Shabbat on Friday night. Tonight we count six weeks and four days of the Omer.

This is the day of Netzach within Malchut, endurance within nobility. Today I am thinking about how I use my authority and leadership. It is not enough to lead, one must lead toward something – toward a goal that makes the world a bit closer to what it should be.

Anyone who has ever taken on a job of authority knows the conundrum. Do leaders lead in order to keep things going as they have been, or do they lead in order to transform and move people forward to new places? To use a common sports metaphor, do we limit ourselves to "blocking and tackling," or do we try to change the parameters of the game itself?

Practically speaking, we have to do both. If we don't do sound and honest maintenance of institutions, there is no chance of ever moving forward. On the other hand, institutions that exist just to keep themselves going don't last long in a world that is defined by change. More importantly, the don't fulfill the universal mission of making our world a better place.

We need leaders, but we also need leaders with a vision worth following.

On this 46th Day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to making my leadership worthy of the name – not to stay still, but to lead others in moving forward to a vision of becoming better people in a better community in a better world.

May this be a day for you in which you consider the many different ways in which you are a leader. May you find inspiration to take others toward their highest aspirations.

For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 45th Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/29/2014

 
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The 45th day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Thursday night. Tonight we count six weeks and three days of the Omer.

This is the day of Tiferet within Malchut, balance within nobility. What makes our lives noble? Certainly, it has something to do with being honorable, upright and decent. It also has something to being a visible model and leader for others to emulate those qualities. 

Communities – especially faith communities – expect their leaders to be all of those things, and they should. But living a balanced life also means having a private life, a family life, when one is not on display and not demonstrating noble qualities for all to see. We all need time out of the limelight to have balanced, sane lives.

Perhaps the real measure of nobility is the ability to act nobly also when nobody is watching.

My family is going through a crisis right now as someone very dear to us is dying. Forty-five days into the Counting of the Omer is not a good time to stop writing these posts. But I also have to take care of my family. I suppose, that is the noble thing to do.

Do me a favor. On this 45th Day of the Counting of the Omer, say a little prayer for my family. Send me a little bit of the energy I need to be noble for them. 

May this be a day for you are a model for others in living a life of integrity and nobility. But don't forget to be that person for yourself, too.

Thanks.

For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 44th Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/28/2014

 
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The 44th day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Wednesday night. Tonight we count six weeks and two days of the Omer.

This is the day of Gevurah within Malchut, discipline within nobility. On this day, I think about the obligation for self-restraint that goes along with authority. Whenever life gives us power over other people – whether in commerce, in the workplace, or over our children – we have a duty to consider how we use that power and to set boundaries to prevent its abuse.

I think about times when I have lost my temper in dealing with a person whose job it is to serve me. I think about the times when I have said something that deflated the self-esteem of a coworker. I think about the times when I have been overly harsh with one of my children. I recognize that self-discipline is not just a matter of keeping myself from harm, it is a covenant with the people in my life, especially the people who count on me to live up to standards of kindness and respect. To fail in keeping those standards is to lose a bit of ones inherent nobility.

On this 44th Day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit myself to guarding myself against treating others with anything less than the common decency I expect for myself. May this be a day for you in which you set an intention to recognize the power you have over others and to regard that power as a sacred trust.

For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 43rd Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/27/2014

 
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The 43rd day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Tuesday night. Tonight we count six weeks and one day of the Omer. Today is Yom Yerushalayim, Jerusalem Day. It is the holiday that commemorates the anniversary of Israel taking control of East Jerusalem at the end of the Six Day War in 1967.

This is the day of Chesed within Malchut, love within nobility. On this day, I think about how we often believe that the "noble thing to do" is to act tough-minded and dispassionately. We fail to recognize that our compassion and instinct toward kindness and forgiveness is also what makes us noble.

On this date on the Hebrew calendar, the Israeli army overcame Jordanian forces to capture the Old City of Jerusalem and reclaimed the holiest site in Judaism, the Western Wall. The move into the Old City came after Israel had told King Hussein of Jordan that Israeli forces would not move into Jerusalem if there was no aggression against Israel along that front. Despite the warning, Jordan began shelling Israeli civilians on June 6, 1967. Before the end of the following day, Israel had captured East Jerusalem. The war was over. For the first time in two millennia, the Jewish people had sovereignty over their holiest site.

Moshe Dayan, Israel's Defense Minister, famously declared, "We have united Jerusalem." He assured the Arab states that Israel would allow the Muslim and Christian holy places in the Old City to remain under the control of the religious authorities of their faiths. Israel has kept that promise to this day. However, there is something in Dayan's pronouncement that does not ring true – or, perhaps, that seems unfulfilled.

Jerusalem today is not united. In fact, Jerusalem has become less and less united in the decades since the Six Day War. Today the city is divided with entirely separate sections and neighborhoods for Jews and Arabs. Very few Jews wander into the Arab neighborhoods and few Arabs wander into Jewish neighborhoods. 

It is not only ironic, it is painful and heartbreaking that on the day of "love in nobility" there is little love or nobility on either side of the divide. In recent years, some Jews have used Yom Yerushalayim as an occasion for loud and provocative marches through Arab neighborhoods that are designed to infuriate and humiliate Arabs. Many Arabs have a parallel observance on the Muslim calendar, called Quds Day, to denounce Israel and call for its destruction.

I hope for the day when Yom Yerushalayim is not a day for Jews to gloat and incite hatred over the defeat of the Arabs; I hope for the day when Arabs do not see this as a day to swell in their prideful anger. Yom Yerushalayim should be a day, as Moshe Dayan declared, for Jews and Arabs to dwell together in unity. That is a much greater nobility than the hatred and recrimination that defines the divide today.

On this 43rd Day of the Counting of the Omer, I pray for the nobility to have compassion, even for enemies. I commit to opening my heart in genuine caring and forgiveness and to find a bit of the nobility that is lacking in this fractured world.

May this be a day in which you discover the love that is at the heart of the highest nobility.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

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IDF paratroopers at the Western Wall in June of 1967.

The 42nd Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/26/2014

 
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The 42nd day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Monday night. Tonight we count six weeks of the Omer. In the United States, this is the evening of Memorial Day.

This is the day of Malchut within Yesod, nobility within connection. On this day, I think about how our lives are made noble in the ways we connect with others, both those who are immediately present in our lives and those who are removed from us by distance and by death.

Today's holiday used to be called Decoration Day, a reference to the flags and flowers that would decorate the stones in military cemeteries. I like "Memorial Day" better. We still have the parades and the wreaths on the graves, but this name puts the emphasis where it belongs – not on the outward display, but on the internal experience of remembering and consecrating the lives of people who have given their all in service to our country. We remember the person, not just the flag, the uniforms and the displays.

The moments that mean the most to me on Memorial Day are the ones in which people tell the real stories of the men and women who have died. Here is one such story, about Lance Cpl. James Boelk, a Marine who was killed in Afghanistan in 2010. His family describes him as a practical joker and a guy who "loved to make the girls scream." He also was a soldier who was killed by a roadside bomb in Helmand province in southern Afghanistan, another young soldier who died in service to his country.

When we take the time to remember people – not as statistics or as idealized heroes, but as real people with real lives – we find the true nobility in their lives and in our own. This is a day for remembering human beings, not wartime policies and strategies, not flowers and bunting. It is a time to connect with the humanity that connects us all to each other and to remember that we discover our own highest selves in that connection.

On this 42nd Day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to honoring and truly remembering those who have served and those whose lives have made my life possible. May this be a day in which you find blessing in the relationships and personal connections that bring dignity, honor and nobility to your life.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 41st Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/25/2014

 
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The 41st day of the Counting of the Omer begins on Sunday night. Tonight we count fIve weeks and six days of the Omer. 

This is the day of Yesod within Yesod, connection within connection. On this day, I think about the depth of my connection to others. I ask myself, not just whether my relationships are enduring and compassionate, but whether they are truly connections at all. I ask myself if I connect deeply with others or if I remain superficial and aloof with the other people in my life.

Social scientists like to remind us that human beings are social animals. On a fundamental, biological level, we need each other. Without others to share our lives, life itself seems pointless and purposeless to us.

Jewish tradition has the same insight. The great medieval Jewish philosopher, Maimonides (or Rambam, as he is known in Jewish tradition) said that, in the absence of others to share our lives, all of the Torah is pointless. The Torah only exists – and that means that our relationship with God, too, only exists – in order for us to interact with and to know one another. Knowing other people, entering their lives in true connection, is necessary for knowing God. In some way, relating to other human beings is relating to God.

On this 41st day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to deepening my relationships with others. I set an intention for myself to move beyond the superficial and towards deeper sharing, belonging, listening and caring with the people in my life. 

May this be a day in which you find blessing in forming connections with others that are deeply rewarding and meaningful. May those connections open for you a deeper connection to God.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

The 40th Day of the Counting of the Omer

5/24/2014

 
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The 40th day of the Counting of the Omer begins as Shabbat ends on Saturday night. Tonight we count fIve weeks and five days of the Omer. 

This is the day of Hod within Yesod, humility within connection. On this day, I think about connecting with other people in a way that really allows me to see who they are. I remember how easy it is for my ego to cloud the way I perceive others – thinking first about my interests, my desires, and my assumptions before I bother to see the world through the other person's eyes.

Letting go of ego is one of the most difficult spiritual challenges we face. We live our whole lives locked into being just one person. We never get to take off the lens of our ego to try on the experience of the world from another person's point of view. It is so difficult to get out of our own way. Yet, there is hardly anything that is more richly rewarding in life than connecting so deeply with another person that we see the world as if it were new, as if we had never seen anything else before.

In order to achieve a connection to another person that is that deep, it is necessary first to let go of our ongoing fascination with ourselves. In order for me to rise to the heights that are possible when I identify with another, I first have to have the humility to recognize that not everything is "all about me."

On this 40th day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to keeping my focus and attention on others. I commit to noticing my preconceptions about others and to let go of those images and thoughts. I commit to trying to see the world through the eyes of another.

May this be a day in which you find blessing in the true and selfless connections you form with other people. May the experience open for you worlds beyond your imagining.


For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer

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