This is the day of Gevurah within Netzach, discipline within endurance. In some ways, the pairing of discipline – think of it as "inner strength" – and endurance – think of it as "staying power" – is natural. It can be hard to distinguish one from the other. But think of it this way: It is possible to run for a very long time if you are afraid that something is chasing you. Having a lot of endurance does not necessarily mean that you keep going out of your own inner strength.
On this day, I think about whether it is my own will that drive my long-term energy. I think about the way that fear of failure can sometimes become a more potent motivator for me than the desire to achieve my goals. On this day, I think about putting my own resolve and determination into the driver's seat of my life's journey.
On this 23rd day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to reexamining my goals in life and allowing the drive to achieve them come from my own will and desire. I commit to examining and correcting the ways that I allow the need to please other people, the fear of disapproval, and just sheer momentum to keep me running.
May this be a day in which you discover that the greatest source of energy in your life is you. May you become a blessing to yourself by doing what you really want to do.
For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer