This is the day of Hod within Tiferet, humility within balance. On this day, I am thinking about how my quest for a harmony and equanimity in life cannot be a selfish or ego-driven. If I were to seek only my peace as a narcissistic, navel-gazing pursuit, there could never be any real balance or harmony. The search for real balance in life must be selfless and outwardly directed.
This is something I often consider in prayer. Praying can be a lonely and solipsistic activity. When praying, my mind is often a closed loop of self-referential questions. Am I good enough? Do I care enough? Am I doing this right? In those moments, though, when prayer really works for me, I find that I break out of the loop and forget to think about myself. That is where my most meaningful prayer experience lies – in an awareness of being part of a larger reality.
On this 19th day of the Counting of the Omer, I commit to finding balance in my life by looking past the horizon of my own ego and, instead, connecting with world beyond myself. It is the world of action, doing things for others and helping to repair the world. In these activities I simultaneously lose myself and rediscover my better self.
May this be a day in which you find peace by lowering your ego and connecting in wonder with the world beyond yourself.
For the introduction to the Counting of the Omer, click on this link:
The First Day of the Counting of the Omer